Thursday, 15 December, 2022

Unfair Customs and Traditions and Early Marriage

Mawada (pseudonym),  a female who is 27 years old, did not live her childhood like other girls, as she got married early, when she was not yet 18 years old, and moved to an area hundreds of miles away from her father's home in Rudae district. Unfortunately a terrible custom was known when marrying there, which is that the bride can't visit her father's house only after several months of marriage , which made her feel that she is in a place like a prison, far from her family and friends, and with a strange family that was difficult to get used to, she didn’t  know anything about them, and  was completely banned from any contact with her family.

Because of her young age and her lack of experience in life, Mawada could only find crying as a way to express what she felt. She was subjected to psychical violence by the husband and verbal violence by his family after each crying fit. She decided to run away returning to her father's house, her only and safe haven, with a feeling of joy that she was able to get out of prison and torment to freedom, but things happened contrary to what she expected, as soon as she arrived at her father's house, one of her brothers beat her severely without mercy because he was  afraid of what people would say, because she violated the customs and traditions, and returned before the end of the specified months after marriage, not only that, but he returned her to her husband’s house against her will, ignoring her pleas, crying and blood flowing from her head!

Mawada says: "I ran barefoot to my family's house, but my father did not care to hear what happened to me and forcibly took me back to my husband's house"

Mawada returns brokenhearted to her husband’s house, who, in turn, continued with his family a series of insults to her, on an ongoing basis, because of her violation of customs, and also her weakness after her brothers’ recent behavior with her.

Days and months passed, and  Mawada suffered each day more than the previous one, as  she  got tired of insults, beatings and housework at home, and her suffering and pain have increased her sense that there is no escape from her husband's house after she became pregnant with her first child.All this suffering precipitated the emergence of symptoms such as sadness, introversion, crying and inability to sleep, in addition to nervousness and screaming, which made her husband take her back to her father's house, while she was pregnant  and said that she is crazy.

Her family received her after this marriage destroyed her childhood, her smile and her beauty, as well as her health, and it was only a few days after she returned to her father’s house until she gave birth to her first child, yet her husband did not even ask about her or  the child which made her symptoms more and more severe as she became aggressive and nervous, she tried to commit suicide and destroy everything around her, in addition to abnormal and strange behaviors such as changing her voice and speaking in the voice of a seven-year-old girl.

The bad condition of Mawada made her family decide to treat her, by going to a number of sheikhs. They thought that she was bewitched, but that was hopeless. After that, they went to more than one doctor, but all their efforts were fruitless, because of she refused to be treated.

 

 

 

Later, the family moved from Radaa area to the city of Taiz because of the brother's work and one of their new  neighbors saw her and told them  about a well-known psychological support center that receives such cases and provides services for free. So that Mawada's  family took her to the psychosocial support center (PSS) as a last attempt by them to help their daughter, and upon her arrival, she sat down with the psychologist who studied her case.Then, she was referred to the psychiatrist who decided to enter Mawada into the admission department because she needed it urgently after being diagnosed with schizophrenia, in order to remain under constant observation, in addition to undergoing psychological sessions.

The psychologist who follows up on the case of the survivor says, " when Mawada was admitted to the admission department, the apprehension and fear were apparent on her, and she refused to be approached be anyone.But as the days passed, she began to be reassured that everyone around her aimed to help her, to start a program of psychological sessions along with psychotropic medication ".

 In the psychological sessions, the focus was on more than one part such as psychological analysis to find out the reasons and pressures that Mawada was subjected to and cognitive behavior to change thoughts and beliefs and to give her many skills, including: flexibility and problem solving, and there were also family counseling sessions with her brothers in order to provide and create a supportive family atmosphere for her after going out from the admission department, she was later referred to the Yemen Women Union  Organization to facilitate her access to legal services, and to carry out her  divorce procedures. Indeed, the divorce took place in absentia, due to the absence of the husband, who did not even bother himself to see his daughter’s.

After nearly five months of treatment and psychological sessions, Mawada's condition began to stabilize and she returned to speak in her original voice, in addition to the disappearance of most of the psychotic symptoms and she became sociable, where she started to have conversations with those around her and participated in the activities that took place in the admission department such as handicrafts, and drawing. Moreover, her talk became more logical, and she had many dreams, including taking care of her daughter, and she also started looking for a job that would help her.

Mawada's sister says: "I was hopeless of my sister's recovery after we went through a number of sheikhs and many doctors, but thanks to the psychosocial Support Center and its cooperating staff, my sister has improved greatly, thank you very much."

As for Mawada, she said: "I see life differently. I have my daughter which is a gift from God, and I will remain strong for her and for myself. It is the beginning of a new life."

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